October 11th – 27th
What is longing?
I have noticed that longing and shame (guilt) circulate within me. I then notice the haste of the power of imagination. I’m at home at once, heavily breathing, shameful of all the dreadful things I was tempted to do. In the end, it is longing that throws away the key of my beautiful dungeon of revolt.
These paintings were created as a consequence of an overflow of visual content and balancing between on one hand, accepting the torture of a chaotic visual everydayness, and imagining some other utopia on the other. Time seizes to exist and what remains is only a brand as the only reality, resembling an abstract parameter (a constant, lighthouse) around which everything takes place, as if bright colours showed up at once on our names resembling a brand.
The question is what the visual representation of reality is, is it hybridized by a utopic image or the other way around. This dualism structured the dialogue between materialism and idealism which is rooted by the dialectic heritage called the spirit of time (l’esprit du temps), defined by taste. But machines weren’t self-moving or self-designed, and not in the least autonomous. They couldn’t reach the human dream but just mock at it. They weren’t man, the author himself, but just a motoric caricature of a reproduced dream.
But maybe I wanted to break loose from my own subjectivity, agreeably and exultingly spat on while I laugh. Then fulfilled like that, to observe the yellow, black, green and rasterized beautiful equanimities. In that I can then dream of the bad things which others were encouraging me to. We could communicate through mutually fulfilling each other with photosynthesis and what would finally arise through sweet pleasure is “Yes, this is how it is, isn’t it?”. I could then continue with my apathy, and it with its own, and me with its amenities.
Translation: Isidora Krstić